Danger, Will Robinson. Danger!

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Headline from an NEC press release:

NEC Delivers Self-Evolving Storage Platform

Even if it’s true, they should have reworded it. For crying out loud…”self-evolving?”  Here’s the opening paragraph of this stirring saga

NEC Corporation of America…today unveiled the second generation of the NEC HYDRAstor HS8 grid storage platform, delivering the industry’s only self-evolving storage solution. The new HYDRAstor nodes announced today — which are greener, denser, and faster — work seamlessly with both previous and future generations of HYDRAstor nodes. This heterogeneous feature of the HYDRAstor grid platform allows the storage grid to evolve with new technologies — without having to start a new grid system and without data migration, provisioning, forklift upgrades, application downtimes and data loss. HYDRAstor’s unique “community of smart nodes” enables IT to non-disruptively ride both technology and growth curves so that a single storage grid can continually evolve with greener, denser, and faster nodes.

Wow. Let’s see, that’s “self-evolving,” “greener,” “denser,” AND “faster.” It “works seamlessly” and allows the smart buyers to “non-disruptively ride both technology and growth curves….”

I would continue, but this is going to devolve into a fisking real soon now, so I’ll just hit save and walk. Away.